how will i realize when i am happy? tonight a guy i know told me he is finally happy to be out a relationship and plans on being happily single for a while. this is a guy who tells me he loves me everyday and that he misses me. then he goes and tells me this and that he is truely happy. i of course mention that i wish i would be that happy. and he told me that i am and i just dont realize it... wtf is that?!?!!he says i need time to realize it. how much fucking time do i need? i tell him. hasnt it been enough fucking time? and he has the nerve to say "obviouslly not"
when will it be enough time? being lonely and single fucking hurts! its been a little over 4yrs. no one wants a relationship with me.. being the girl they want to be around but never date is heartbreaking... im tired of feeling like no one in the world wants me. seriously. im tired of falling for guys who say they want to be with me and never have the balls to to thru with it. AM I THAT HORRIBLE? IS IT THAT HARD TO LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM? I COULD BE SO WONDERFUL AT LOVING SOMEONE IF ONLY THEY WOULD GIVE ME THE CHANCE.
Showing posts with label men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label men. Show all posts
Dec 10, 2011
Apr 7, 2009
Things I hate about you
I Hate the way I could never hate you.
I hate the way you looked at me.
I hate the way I fell for you.
I hate the way your hand felt in mine.
I hate the way you made me feel.
I hate the way you touched me.
I hate the way we talked.
I hate the nights I cried.
I hate the way you lied to me.
I hate the times we fought.
I hate the way we always made up.
I hate the way I was never good enough.
I hate the way it was always her.
I hate the way I was never yours.
I hate the times we were together.
I hate the times we werent.
I hate the way you made me laugh.
I hate the way your lips felt on mine.
I hate the way you said you loved her.
I hate the way you said you loved me.
I hate everything about you...
But most of all, I hate that I still love you.
But I know that I dont want you any more
I hate the way you looked at me.
I hate the way I fell for you.
I hate the way your hand felt in mine.
I hate the way you made me feel.
I hate the way you touched me.
I hate the way we talked.
I hate the nights I cried.
I hate the way you lied to me.
I hate the times we fought.
I hate the way we always made up.
I hate the way I was never good enough.
I hate the way it was always her.
I hate the way I was never yours.
I hate the times we were together.
I hate the times we werent.
I hate the way you made me laugh.
I hate the way your lips felt on mine.
I hate the way you said you loved her.
I hate the way you said you loved me.
I hate everything about you...
But most of all, I hate that I still love you.
But I know that I dont want you any more
Mar 4, 2009
Mar. 3rd 09 convo between amber and chris
Amber: Dude this is amber I'm with sam why are you such an ass to her she just wants to hang out with her why does it always have to be a PENIS night why can't you for once grow a pair of balls and be a nice guy and just hang out with the girl you like and that likes you why is that so hard
Chris: I am not that kind of a guy.
Amber: OBVIOUSLY so then don't tell sam you will hang out and make plans just to leave her hanging and hoping for something that will never happen let her be happy and if you can't be a friend then tell her that and let her move on cause I know she likes you and what you are doing this game is bs
Chris: Firstly i never said i would do anything. Period.
Amber: You asked her what she was doing today to ANY girl that makes it seems as though you want to hang out. You clearly don't like samantha as a friend
Chris: No i wanted to know. Has nothing to do with what i could do
Amber: So why do you say that you will go on walks and go hang out at your house and then ! when she takes you up on the offer you suddenly would rather hang out with the boys?
Amber: No payson told her to go over one time sorry I left that out but you do say you will go on walks and then never follow through you are such a lame dude I mean you are either interested in being her friend or your not seriously don't you care if you she is happy let her be happy shes a great person but you can't see that because you never give her the time of day
Chris: I do she just makes up extra shit i never said
Amber: What do you mean? what does she "make up"
Chris: Wtf! I have no idea
Amber: Well you can't say she says things you never said that implies that she is putting words in your mouth but REGARDLESS do you want her as a friend in your life?
Chris: I want her as a friend but she always says i did commit but i never did
Amber: She just wants some time with you is it so hard for you to just give her time once a week or every other week she just wants you to treat her the same way as you treat your guy friends
Chris: Wow
Amber: Wow what?
Chris: Not getting a god damn thing im saying
Amber: I get it she says things that you dont think you said but do you ever really hang out with her
Chris: I am not that kind of a guy.
Amber: OBVIOUSLY so then don't tell sam you will hang out and make plans just to leave her hanging and hoping for something that will never happen let her be happy and if you can't be a friend then tell her that and let her move on cause I know she likes you and what you are doing this game is bs
Chris: Firstly i never said i would do anything. Period.
Amber: You asked her what she was doing today to ANY girl that makes it seems as though you want to hang out. You clearly don't like samantha as a friend
Chris: No i wanted to know. Has nothing to do with what i could do
Amber: So why do you say that you will go on walks and go hang out at your house and then ! when she takes you up on the offer you suddenly would rather hang out with the boys?
Amber: No payson told her to go over one time sorry I left that out but you do say you will go on walks and then never follow through you are such a lame dude I mean you are either interested in being her friend or your not seriously don't you care if you she is happy let her be happy shes a great person but you can't see that because you never give her the time of day
Chris: I do she just makes up extra shit i never said
Amber: What do you mean? what does she "make up"
Chris: Wtf! I have no idea
Amber: Well you can't say she says things you never said that implies that she is putting words in your mouth but REGARDLESS do you want her as a friend in your life?
Chris: I want her as a friend but she always says i did commit but i never did
Amber: She just wants some time with you is it so hard for you to just give her time once a week or every other week she just wants you to treat her the same way as you treat your guy friends
Chris: Wow
Amber: Wow what?
Chris: Not getting a god damn thing im saying
Amber: I get it she says things that you dont think you said but do you ever really hang out with her
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