Mar 22, 2012
Mar 20, 2012
Quote Challenge #9 Favorite band said
"We've all been sorry, we've all been hurt. But how we survive is what makes us who we are." -Rise Against, Survive
Mar 19, 2012
Mar 18, 2012
Quote Challenge #7 Random
2: Do not reminisce on things I find ridiculous
3: Regret...
4: Do not lose focus on the significant things vs. the insignificant
5: Do not cheat myself out of a good opportunity
6: Do not choose to expect less than what I am capable of
7: Do not lose to life..
Mar 17, 2012
Quote Challenge #6 Fave TV show
~Charmed,Paige
Mar 16, 2012
Quote Challenge #5 favorite singer said
I like having my hair and face done, but I'm not going to lose weight because someone tells me to. I make music to be a musician not to be on the cover of Playboy.
-Adele
Mar 15, 2012
Quote Challenge # 4 your favorite book
Persuasion, Jane Austen
Mar 14, 2012
Mar 13, 2012
Mar 12, 2012
Who should start the kiss? The boy or the girl?
Well for me ilike it a lot more when the guy goes for the kiss first. Its an amazing feeling knowin someone wants to kiss you. There's a sertain innocense in it and or even a primal feeling to it. I hae also been the one to initiate it and I have been told they like it so I do it too but honstly I like when the guy does it, it feels normal and a lot less awkward.
Ever fallen asleep one someone?
No.. never had that much alone time or the availability to do it. Yes there are times we lay together but never fall asleep together. People tend to fall asleep on me tho, apparently I'm really cmfortable..
Whens the next time you will kiss someone?
Hopefully if I get to see chris this week it will be then.. but if not.. then who knows.
The last person who made you cry?
That would be chris.. the last time I saw him I cried 3 times all for diffferent reasons ad only one of those reasons was bad and it honestly wasn't a horrible bad it was he answered me truthfully and it wasn't the answer I wanted kind of bad. He's made me cry before but never when I was with him... that was something new. There were happy and sad tears
Do you miss anyone?
There is a yes and a no to almost everyone who just came to mind.
My ex bff, yeah I miss her sometimes. I miss that I had someone to be with every day but I don't mss her manipulative persomality and her abuse towards her children and the people around her.
I miss my grandmothers, luckily I hae a few awesome memories with both of them throughout the years.
Chris.. I miss chris more than I should. Without him I'm close to empty inside and for him I'm just another clingy lonely girl he sometimes wants to hang out with. He's my best guy friend and I am rarely even a blip on his radar.
I miss my best friend who moved to georgia to be with her husband.
I miss the relationship I used to have with my mother.
Do you tend to fall for the same type of person over and over again?
More like I tent to fall for the same person over and over again. I have been inlove with chris on and off again for the last 6 years. He is a guy who can. Break my heart a million times but for some sick reason I can't get enough of him even at his worse. Yes I have liked others and even gone on dates with others but they all tendd to be of the douchebag variety.
Ever kissed someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Sadly I have. Tho at the time I did not know he had a girlfriend. He didn't mention it until a day or two after, but I wasnt too hurt by it and it didn't happen again
Have you ever done something you told yourself you would never do?
I dont think I have honestly. There are still things I have sworn never to do that I haven't done ad I'm glad I haven't done them. There are things I didn't think I would have the balls to do but did but nothing I have ever sworn never to do, I am pretty good a not doing things.
Do you like the rain?
Do I like the rain? Like is an understatement. I love the rain. Yes I dislike when its sprinkling but I love rain real rain that gets you soaked. The kind you can hear bouncing off of every surface with the doors and windows closed. Rain makes me breath a sigh of releaf. It calms me. It makes me want to take long walks in the dark with someone who can appreciate it as much as I do. I love the puddles and the flood seasons and the way everything is so clean after. It calms me more than anyone else can.
Do you tell your mom or dad everything?
I have never told my dad anything. I have always hated him too much to include him in anything in my life.
When I was younger I told my mom everything, we would stay up all hours of the night talking about things going on in my life. That stopped when I was maybe 18. She just stopped listening, she would fall asleep of just ignore me so I got mad and decided never to tell her anything. Yes there are times I have wanted to run to her and tell her what happened while I was out. For years she knew I was inlove with chris, she didn't like him but accepted that I did so she let me deal with him on my own. The night chis kissed me for the first time I ran home wanted almost needng to tell her but when I got home she said hi and went back to sleep almost immediatley. I pissed me off, she lost her chance to know what was going on in my life.. her time is gone.
Has anyone ever told you they never want to lose you?
I have been thinking about that one, and honestly I don't think anyone has yet. Its sad I guesss. I know my bestfriend and I have said things along those lines but syill. We have been appart for a few years and whenever we need to talk we contact eachother. We are lucky if we get to see eachother once a year. We may not talk all the time but she is always there for me and I'm there for her. We both know we can't live without the other.
Does anyone completely understand you?
Is that even possible? I don't even know if I completely understand myself.. I know there are a few who understand parts of me and who I am but since I have so many walls up people don't get the chance to understand me. Its taken me years to open up as much as I have and I still have a long way to go, so no I don't think anyone completely understands me. Hopefully that will change one day.
Who was the last person to see you cry?
Well I have been doing a lot of crying this last month and a half, but honestly a lot of it has been on my own. I believe the last person to actually see the tears and crys would be chris last month.
What do you do when you get nervous?
When I get nervouse I get super quiet and my mind tends to go blank, its actually quite aggrivating for me really. I also tend to pick at my nailpolish, if it won't pick, then I chew at it until its completely gone. I don't bite my nails like I used to, I just chew at the polish. Gross I know...
Is your bed up against more than one wall?
Yes its against 3 walls. I have a very small room with a queen size bed lol for years I let it take up most of my room but decided one day that I never used my closet bcause I use my dressers so I tore out the shelves of my closet and placed my bed in there. It opened my room up a bunch and its kinda a reading nook when I want it to be.
When was the last time you felt honestly broken?
That would have to be a few days after valentines day.. it wasn't even the whole valentines day lack of a guy in my life thing either. That week I had lost 3 people in my life all unexpectedly. My heart was crushed and work was stressing me out. A friend asked me to hang out and I said yes. I needed to talk and to be with somone who wasn't family. He said to meet so I got ready and I did I met where we were supposed to meet and even went to his house when I didn't want to wait anymore. I knocked ad rang the doorbell a few times but no one came. He wasn't even home. I called and he didn't answer, text and didn't get a response.. I was crushed even more and mad. I went home 10 minutes later lied to my parents as to why I was home so quick then went into my room for the night. I cried and cried. He had broken me more than I had ever been broken. Crying only helped to an extent,I cut and cut and cut. I ended up cutting 15 times that night. I was broken and alone. It was the most alone I have been in a very long time.
If you were ever caught cheating, would you fess up?
In school i Was never one to cheat. I lived in fear of getting caught.
In relationships I don't believe in cheating either. If you are so bored with the person you are with I believe in ending it before someon gets hurt. If you love someone else own up to it don't be a bitch about it, do something about it.
But I guess that didn't answer the question.. I think it depends on the situation.
Quote Challenge #1 Love
"You cannot force love, I realized. Its there or it isn't. If its not there, you've got to be able to admit it. If it is there, you've got to do whatever it takes to protect the ones you love"
-Richelle Mead
Mar 5, 2012
Hate kids
You know what's sad? Because of my job I no longer think I want children.. being a daycare worker has slowly killed my love of kids.. growing up I always said I want atleast 4, now I'm not so sure. Since working here I have given up a few of my friends because when being around them ihave to be around their kids and sinse its after work I don't want to have to deal with their kids.. horrible I know but I have come to the realization that while I love my job and still prefer working with kids instead of adults , on the same level I hate children and no longer wish to have any..