There's a book on my bookcase filled with knives, box cutters and razors just waiting in silence for the day they hear my skin scream. And I took it down today. I haven't decided if I am going to use them or not. It has been 238 days since the last te I cut and I honestly have been doing well with the urges. But this week hasn't even began and I'm already stressed about that will happen. I don't know how to handle myself, I am so filled with stress and hate I can't seem to get rid of these feelings. The only way i have ever been able to deal with emotions like his was to cut. So now the question is do I open the book?